I dreamt of Magdaline,
She dreamt of me
Sisters in sorrow
Sisters in life.
the daily battle of Armageddon arm and arm
skipping as children often do
the light of some god goes beside us
as they often do

chop lickin' daydream

I know how you feel Pete

I just want to snap out of it

But the "its" are avalanching down. My friend got cancer for Christmas. Not fair. She has a son and a grandson to raise. And her brother is oh so ill now. One of my best friends. So now I have necklaces to make as he requested one.

And I must knit myself a hat. It's just so cold here to me. I hate cold ears. My kid friends got me a hat and scarf for Christmas, thinking it would help. But they are polyester. Makes my teeth chatter just thinking about it.

But I won't go on here with my tales of woe. but I must add that my Doctor, after looking at my back x-rays thinks sky diving will no longer be on my list of things to do. Nor will motor biking. but kitties sleeping on my feet is on the plus list. Right on Luci Blu.

And my dear friend has returned to Phoenix. A delight she is and a grounding factor in my crazy head. As soon as my meds arrive in the mail, I'm heading south for few days. I have an appointment with my social worker. he has some ideas about reeducating me as my Doctor has hairdresser on my list of no mores. Also am going to let him talk to the credit card people. After a year of existing on them I'm a bit in the rears. can't have that at 55.

and then , I am so sad about Benazir Bhuttos Assassination. Karma, sometimes, just seems more like a heavy handed rotton drunk pervert, then a way of life. Maybe today, I best remember, earth has know sorrow that heaven can not heal. And leave it at that.

Bruno

Just me and my dog

the town I lived in till I was 8

My Mother and I walked here almost every day to check the mail. The post mistress always had a Hershey bite for me. I loved being alive then. when my parents weren't scraping it up about something, life was good. I skied in the winter and rode horses in the summer. can't beat that.

naughty or nice?

Lets not forget Luci Blu

Can't think of anything good to say my self

So I swiped this of of dAAves site.



Dump Those Negative Habits Now!
by Mark Victor Hansen

If you want to distance yourself from the masses and enjoy a rich and unique lifestyle, understand this - your habits will determine your future. The fact is, if you keep on doing things a certain way, you will get a predictable result. That's the simple law of Cause and Effect.

Successful habits create positive rewards.
Negative habits breed negative consequences.

If you want to enjoy longevity, you must have healthy habits. If you are in the habit of starving your most important relationships of time, energy and love, how can you expect a happy outcome? If you spend money on the fly or don't save any money, your bad habits will lead you to a never-ending cycle of work.


Shift yourself out of your bad habits. Fortunately, you can jump from this bad habits path anytime you want. It's a very simple process - it just takes some applied focus.


Here's the step-by-step process I recommend:
Clearly identify your bad or unproductive habits. Write them down.

a) Be specific.
b) Remember to consider the long-term consequences should you continue in this bad habit. As an example, a couple cigarettes a day may not seem like much, but after 10 years, the buildup of having smoked 7,300 cigarettes remains in your system.
c) Consider habits at home, in your communications and relations with others, at work, in your driving habits, in your free time, and in matters related to your physical, emotional and spiritual health.

It's all about Pete

My Christmas card

leaping lu

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1393664287

Snow zone

They know if you've been bad or good
So be good for good for goodness sake.

My Hollywood

Bruce gets around

The International School of Minnesota

"What a crazy sight to see;
Why they're bigger than the tree;
Eating berries for their lunch;
Who is this wild bunch? The turkeys of ISM."

CB




The resident turkeys of The International School of Minnesota enjoy a lunch of berries from a small tree near the front entrance.

Thought snipits

Well what do you know. I feel almost normal today. I think, it's hard to remember what that is. I got up early and had waffle and cranberry goat cheese with cinnamon. A splash of green tea. I built a fire in the fire place, emptied the dishwasher, brushed my teeth and then I was tired. I took the tea and curled up with Luci Blu and NPR.

All the news I'll ever need. maybe to much, but Sunday Baroque will fix all that. On the news, they had done an interview with a female interrogator from Guantanamo. Soul searching for her, gutwrenching for me. She found redemption thru acceptance. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=16993136
Its funny how the mind works, as she spoke of her clients as murderers and rapists. Bet they believe in their own redemption too. As do I. At least something akin to it. At least think I do. And hope for my own sort of epiphany. At least I think I do.

I seem to rap my teeth around every thought I have until my mental jaws hurt. Probably need a hobby. One that doesn't take alot of money or effort, which I have little of either. Luci Blu has the right idea. she eats (loves to eat) has a momentary spurt of catharsis at warp speed and then curls up on the DVR player to nap. Its warm and it vibrates. Her own personal kitty vibrating bed. Silly girl.

My biggest problem with hobbies is I loose interest faster than a, well , fast. yesterday I watched a quilting show so i wanted to do that. I have bags of scraps of cloth I've been collecting for years. I think I just like to collect and live in my head. Just the thought of pulling out my sewing machine has me running for the couch. Did I say run? Ha!

Sick ,self absorbed, no words to share

glad i don't have no quarrels with god

the key to a mans heart

love

you don't like how small your room is you know where you can go, cause beggars can't be choosers.

I just want to go home

Pete

Just thought I'd scream.

another blue eyed kitty

A slice of the past to take the edge off my mood. Its just for to hard to identify, to nail it down and send it packen' . I'll just snatch a flik from a better yesterday.

Happy Thanks Giving

Marks Art

check out the rest of his fabulous work clik on Marks Art.

Mark got me started

Girly goes to the Grand Canyon

Thinking back

looking at the dog

the song raised questions

the road disappeared around the bend

and the sun was reaching for the night.

House cleaning

I'm going to make an attempt to clean house today. Thats what I do to cover the rent I can't afford to pay anymore. That and cooking dinner. Its worked out so far. Not that I like cleaning house mind you, but I surly couldn't find a job anywhere else where I can work a bit and lay down for awhile. Up until now that hasn't even been the case but the interferon, this first week, has really knocked me down. Hopefully this will pass soon.

Watching the show

Watching an Apache K-9 unit officer shout German commands to a Belgian shepherd to take down a white guy. A most diverse and fascinating performance at our little dog show. As you can see, Pete would rather pan the crowd for dog friends.

I am soo fricken' sick today I can't believe it. This Morning I thought I was gonna fall out of bed shaking from the chills. So I ate a motrin and drank a liter of water and Kev turned up the heat in the house. It must have really been cold as the cat was sleeping under the covers on my chest.

Just incase anyone really does read this and wonders why I may quit posting so much for a while. I think it will get better though as the week trudges on. I guess WriMo just might have to wait till next year unless I feel significantly better.

The last time I did this treatment I didn't really start to feel bad until about 6 months. I was even working then 40, sometimes more, a week and driving to and fro 45 minutes each way. I guess thats what happens in 3 years. :+P

here I am busy again

I told myself I was going to cut back on all my volunteer work, but it seems like I have a hard time saying no. I just forget I don't have the energy to be the ever ready bunny anymore. My book writing dropped to a trickle. I hope I can catch up.

Luci Blu went to the vet a few days ago to get rid of her farts and what do yo know, she was ready to go into heat. Se turned out to be older than anyone would have guessed. She just a small cat. So she got spayed on the spot Wednesday. She is not supposed to jump and of course the the first thing she did is leap up into my loft bed. So I put her in the big cage I used when Pete was recovering. She is like a little monkey swinging from the top of the cage, knocking over her water, rolling in her clumping kitty litter, spilling her cat food. What a mess. So I have been lifting her in and out of my bed, this means I have to stay in my room and wait for her to decide what she wants to do next.

The big dog park bash is tomorrow and I'm doing the coffee. Get the coffee urns from business I asked to donate the coffee. Borrow hot pots, buy coffee cups and cream and sugar, Get a money box.... Get there at 7:30 am. Tonight I have a presentation to give and won't get home till 10pm. I suppose I'll have to put Luci in the cage so she can do her monkey act will I'm gone.

Some friends have invited us over for dinner after the love your pet thing. Yea. Love somebody else's cooking. And next Sunday We are going to do a motorcycle toy run. I'm going to start interferon treatment this Sunday evening. And I really want to finish the NaNoWriMo. I was depressed for a minute but decided I really was a lucky person to have so many things to do. I'm certain there are many worse scenarios for my life right now and if I focus in on the negative thats just what I'll get. So I readjusted my thinking and things got better.

Like my flyer I made?

John Coltrane :: Alabama :: Jazz Casual

[via FoxyTunes / John Coltrane]

the Raven

well here I sit, blogging. Lurking. My Writers group has chosen to meet at a very noisy java joint with wifi. I think I am more of a loner writter.The food is good. The company is good. but I can't keep my eyes an ears focused on my book, It isn't as nice as Comma coffee but that might not be a far comparison.

My friend cam over to visit Luci Blu and we found out just how feral she is. Like lightning she disappeared to the deep dark corner on my room. I didn't even know it existed. Like a worm whole. she popped back in about twenty minutes later and now that Noel was gone she was back to being her little sweet self. Goood kitty. She is more tolerant of the the dogs then people.

She goes to the vet tomorrow and I hope they can fix her fart problem. I know, TMI, but...

well back to the great american novel.

2000 words

well its time to stop petting my pussy and lurking about on the internet. And start typing 2000 words.

Paying homage to princess Luci Blu

I've been totaly rapt up in NaNoWriMo. And my new kitten. the dogs come in and pay homage to the princess kitty. When she is on the chair (as opposed to my loft bed) they get so excited because they can almost touch her. She lets them know that isn't gonna happen. Just with the look from her icey blue eyes they know this.

They are like little school boys taking a peak at the new most beautiful girl in the class room. Peaking around the corner and waging their tails and then run off. All to do it again in about 5 minutes and rush off to the living room as if to discuss with each other what they have just seem.

My muse

NaNoWriMo

Well I have managed to write 1.980 words. I wrote for 2 hours last night (after midnight) and 4 hours today. I just couldn't stand some of the errors (and there was many) so I spent another hour cleaning it up a bit. My new cat has been a big help. She seems to have a gas (MMM) problem. Or is that TMI?

I think Pete is jealous so I have to spend so quality time with him. A few extra training sessions and maybe a trip to Office Max. He likes doing therapy there while I print up flyer's for the dog park. He had a cou;le of little girls captivated the other day. Pet Pet Pet.

Snack Time

Luci Blu

steps

old news: Barbie rides high on the hog

I was out yardsaleing last week,and found poor tossed to the curb "Barbie" in a box of other long forgotten pastiche marked 50 cents. Now how, dear readers, could I pass on a bargain such as that.

"Barbie" was my first real doll. I fact my live away father gave me one for my birthday the first year they hit the market. Much to my mothers chagrin. She voiced her horror over the long distance wires using words my 8 year old ears rarely ever heard. At least popping out of her mouth.

I am certain my father had know idea. Some charming toy sales lady most likely assured him that in 1960 "Barbie" was a must have for every little girls cache of wonderful toys. Boy howdy. I was mesmerized. Couldn't take my eyes off of her. Blond Pony and high heals and ... BOOBS. There was no going back. No more baby toys for me. Move over "Betsy Wetsy" theres a new doll in town.

Lewis Baltz

Question 10: I'd like to know what you think about the problems linked to copyright and digital manipulation in general of a piece of art.

Answer: I think it's an amazing period for that. I think probably if you had a child and you wanted to advise him on a profession to enter, I'd say be a copyright lawyer in the digital age because this is something that all of the attorney's all over the world are going to benefit from tremendously. So on the one hand you have organisations -think of Disney, Microsoft - that are trying to gain exclusive rights and copyrights to everything on earth and ownership of imagery in a way has never existed before. And yet at the same time there's the possibility technically of truly duplicating, cloning imagery greater than ever existed before. So I think the most engaging legal struggle of the next twenty or thirty years will be to just to see where these rights of property begin and end. I assume that once something goes on the Internet, once something is released as a CD-ROM, it belongs to everybody.

just a thought

I believe I will attempt to write 50,000 laughable loosely strung together words and call it a novel. I've never done that before. Once upon a time I had not jumped out of an airplane either but that was great fun. I'd do it again but my body won't let me. So I think I'll opt for bad novel writing.

Heres the link, NaNoWriMo, if anyone out there is itching to write, write, write, for nothing but personal gratification that it can be done. Maybe a story about a dog, a Buddhist dog at that. Sort of like Pluto on kryptonite meets Earl.

Any Ideas?

the thinking gap

Fire

The fires in Southern California are really having an effect on me. I don't know if its because I used to live there and at some level still feel like thats home. Or .... There's just so many of fires at once. How could that happen? Is some one going around starting them during the time of the Santa Ana wind?

Of all the weird stuff happening in the world today this fire is really tearing me up. But it is what it is. fire doing its thing. But, (it is all about me), it has triggered some sort of emotion I can't put my finger on. Another opportunity to peak into the normally inaccessible recesses of my mind.

But sadder yet are the four leggeds. I feel helpless and hopeless.

So sad

party on at Scouts place

go to scoutsdaze and wish her happy two.
clic on the blog title.

My gift

Whoa Nellie! I almost got serious. Parish the thought. I must have rocks in my head.

A day to think; Now what?

I think, what do I know about global warming? Clik on the title for some info.

Morning meditation with dog

Lucky Pete

Therapy takes a nap. :+)

"I Wish I was the Moon Tonight"

Chimney falls and lovers blaze
Thought that I was young
Now I've freezing hands and bloodless veins
As numb as I've become

I'm so tired
I wish I was the moon tonight

Last night I dreamt I had forgotten my name
'Cause I had sold my soul but awoke just the same
I'm so lonely
I wish I was the moon tonight

God blessed me, I'm a free man
With no place free to go
I'm paralyzed and collared-tight
No pills for what I fear

This is crazy
I wish I was the moon tonight

Chimney falls and lovers blaze
Thought that I was young
Now I've freezing hands & bloodless veins
As numb as I've become

I'm so tired,
I wish I was the moon tonight

How will you know if you found me at least
'Cause I'll be the one, be the one, be the one
With my heart in my lap
I'm so tired, I'm so tired
I wish I was the moon tonight

Neco Case

Just for today

today is one of those days I am filled with regret. All those if I'd only...... I know there is absolutely no point in going down that road. It will just drag me into the well charted waters of gloom and despair. Two maladies of the soul I can do without.

I'm busy today with plenty of do, this and thats, so I'm safe. Nothing to strenuous, or to mundane. But there are other things I'd rather be doing. Back burnered at least, not impossible stuff. So I have something to look forward to. I just have to conjure up the energy to put it all together.

I, being a person who wants things RIGHT NOW. Hmmm. Some of the things I want may be a bit unrealistic so I have to reset my plans for the future. Of course I'd rather not but, the chances I took in the past have really set the tone for my choice of plans for tomorrow and next week. And the rest of my life.

Ok, so what happened to one day at a time. Well seems like I've always lived in the" here and now". For tomorrow may never come. And what do you know, tomorrow came. And now it seems to be a burden because I don't like my options. Well at least I have options. Maybe I'll run this by my friend in the Joint and see what he has to say about my OPTIONS. I don't even think he'll laugh because all must sound so absurd to him.

He got twenty years for smuggling pot across the Florida/Georgia state line. All his "'partners" are free and living in Mexico today. So much for that stupid code of honor among thieves. But anyway, heath options there aren't in the Federal Pen, so when he gets out in 5 more years he will have worse cirrhosis then I do and be to old for a liver transplant.

Guess I better stop whining now.

Smokestack Lightnin

Naomi Mather

Lucky Pete

Well what a week it has been. First, for all you Lucky Pete fans, he passed his Delta Dog Certification test. Now I have a vet check to do and pay the $20.00 for the paperwork submission. How about a big round of applause for my little gutter dog. He's movin' up. Soon we will be of service in the local hospital, rest homes, schools, and who knows what else.

Another thing that happened this week is I resigned as secretary on the Dog Park Board. As I get sicker with liver disease the less patience I have for the idiosyncratic behaviors of others. Never was good at sand box 101 anyway. And in a few weeks I will be engaging in round two of interferon/ribavirin treatment. I'm certain that will do much for my sunny personality.

And then theres those dates from the past. Its been 29 years since my 1st ex husband met his demise at the wrong end of a colt 45. I really hadn't thought to much about that in years, but as I was blowing around the www last night I ran across a picture of the exact spot he dropped dead. And almost the exact day.

So, thinks I, can't pass up such a red letter opportunity to write more bad poetry. Hence the last entry. Nothing like living on the fringe of the fringes for awhile to produce fodder for the mind to gobble up and upchuck in rants only exciting to my narcissistic self. Well I think I'll go to Home Depot and cruse the toilet section.

So it does

Day late and a dollar short

Well darn, I missed the Artsy Essay at Judith's site. I thought it was the 30th today. Oh well. Here it is anyway.. And oh so dark. The directions for this piece can be found by clicking on the title of this entry. Just in case someone wonders WHY I would even write this. It was fun even if I didn't actually get to participate in the contest.

Delta Society

This is such a wonderful thing that I have been doing for the last few days. And Pete and I test out next Sunday. Clik on the title for information about the organization. I'm just to tired to write about it tonight.

Pete is going to school to become a Therapy Dog

Just taking pictures

I took a slew of pictures at a local dog agility show last Saturday and I have been culling out all the ones that are blurry, out of focus, can't see the dog someone walks in front of the camera... ect. A bigger job than I expected. Heres one of my favorite dogs.