yada yada yada

even though I've done things today to help get out of this situation, I am still discussed with my self and the situation I've gotten my self into. I want to rip this blog apart and throw away everything I own. It just goes on and on. I keep telling myself it will get better and what few friends I still have left are being as supportive as they can. I don't want to let them down but I'm afraid I don't believe a word of it. Shit , I hope this passes soon. I really do know it's me and I need an attitude adjustment. The bf needs... well its really none of my business what he needs but he doesn't need me.