The 5th Friday

There was quite a crowd for Fifth Friday at Comma Coffee in Carson City Nevada last night. A user friendly coffee house... free wireless with every cup of coffee and dogs are welcome. So after my 5 hour drive from Ashland it was such a pleasure to check my e-mails, blog a bit, and rattle my cage with a cup of tasty java. Trusty Pete at my side.







And then the show began. Our MC, Rita Gile, "Think Cabaret" kept the the show on track. A poet and singer in her own right, she was the mortar and shellac. (drea4er@yahoo.com)

Susan Priest made a dark and moody statement "palisade the juju queen" and "39 gashes", but her dance near the end of the show preformed with background guitar of Susan Botich ethereal and quite captivating. ( www.susanpriest.com)

Next, my dear friend and long time confidant shared tails from the Reddog Reveiw #34 and #6. The woman can really turn a phrase as she tales from life's more scandalous side. In part two she did "Anna Sadhorse" one of my favorites. www.ashabot.com

My favorite was a piece preformed by Susan Botich, called "Byways" and it spoke to me about taking responsibility for my own happiness and getting about the act of doing what makes me happy. She wrote the piece just for this event. Her voice strong and clear, her guitar playing impeccable. (sbotich@charter.net)

And then the open mic phase of the program began. Names of audience poets where drawn from a hat. Really a talented diverse group can be found in the capital city. The Mad Hatter herself performed translations of french animal"Prayers from the Art" that added a bit of lightness to the serious trend of the poets.

Then the renouned Ellen Hopkins(www.ellenhopkins.com) read from her Book "Impulse". A book based on the rigors and angst of the teenage years. She was accompanied by budding young performers, Zack Trippiedi(Z_Trippiedi@yahoo.com), Roman Valenzuela(romanvalen@sbglobal.net), and Lindsey Stoeberl(alindseyha@yahoo.com). "Impulse" Can be found on Amazon.com.

Than came Pete's favorite. Scott Sarni(s_sarni@hotmail.com) preforming a monologue from "Hamlet". Pete sat up for the whole thing and slept through the rest of the show.

Dave Fritz(dave@davefritz.com) played guitar for intermission. He was so good everyone found it hard to leave their seats. I really wanted to look at eveyones wares and leave a donation so I did finally pull myself out of the chair.

Part two was more of the same. Much like a second helping of spagetti. Very filling but worth every bite. I do have to add a picture of Susan Priests free form dance. Exquisite.

And also kudos to the young lady that preformed pieces from Ellen's book "Crank", Haley Bennnett(passionforarte@yahoo.com). A most believable performance as well as a good stage presence. "Crank" Can also be found at Amazon.com

What I night was had by all, performers as well as we the audiance. Fifth Friday comes only four times a year. And maybe with a little luck another one at the Comma Coffee(http://www.commacoffee.com/) will happen again. In the meantime be sure and check out the links I've incorporated into this blog and support our artists.

horse

My grand chow

Comma Coffee

Do they miss me?

Today is my last day in Ashland for awhile. Don't know if I'll be back. It doesn't matter really as my life exists where ever I am. But there is something so magical about people that have history in my life...the people that bear witness to change. That jerky type of change that is only visible through periods of absence.

Age is the latest change. Something so surprising from my Peter Pan perspective. It will never happen to us. Not that it was ever vocalized but a given at an intrinsic level. Every grey hair and wrinkle startles me. We have a common bond... that date with time. and I always look for the common bond to feel a part of at which I felt apart from for so long.

I love the act of life today. to feel it, taste it, stop it in its tracks with my camera to savor it a second longer. Its beauty, its horror, its meaninglessness or value. Almost one in the same. Perspective, or none. Clicking the picture because that's what a camera does best.

I'll rehash my road trip. Manipulate the photos when they get boring. Give them some other perspective, a new story, an old story... get your take... on my take... on your take....

Pete likes the tricked out jeep

Sulpture Man of Sunny Valley who must go to sea

and kitten

his water feature sculpture.

Violin maker has onesided conversation with Rosie

violin maker from Sunny Valley

My 2nd sponser from 1983 and now dear friend in his violin making studio.

The Veiw

The veiw is more spectacular than I remember. Things are lush here in Oregon. There was lots of rain last year and when I left it was in the middle of a 10 year draught. Maybe longer. Pete loves it. Lots of thick lush grass to roll in.

I remember why I lived here for s long. My friends are wonderful. Not that they aren't in Arizona but most of there people I have know for 25 years. Lots of history, strong bonds.

My old stomping grounds

overload

I think I'm stimulus overloaded. To much in so few days. I miss my quiet tranquil life. First I had a wonderful visit with Nancy in Phoenix. She looks so good and always is so positive. It really gives me hope about where my life is going and how it might look.

Then I went to Palmdale to visit with a friend and his wife. I've known him since I was 19. We reminisced about old times. The scandalous days of yore. Such a time we had and oh are we ever glad we don't have to live that way anymore.

Then it was off to Santa Barbara to visit with my favorite big sister Barbara. Pete got attacked by her big grey cat. He gives cats a wide birth now. We had so much fun. She used to visit me when I lived in Ashland, Oregon. For the Shakespeare Festival. 25 years of brothers, sisters, dogs,cats, towns, jobs, life in general. No clews yet...:+)

Then the Big Sur. I haven't been back since the fire and the mud slide. Many years have passed but it is never the same. Pete was not impressed with the waves but I loved them. They were VERY cold. It smells so good at the ocean.

Now I'm at my friends house in Ashland. I've known him since 1985. He's one of the few that has stayed in touch. Hes been to visit me twice in AZ. I love his house here. Beautiful view. Well thats all for now. Must go take pictures.

Headed North

Solstice Parade

Santa Barbara State Street

Road Trip

Well my road trip has landed me in Santa Barbara for a few days. Love the beach and my very dear friend for many years invited Pete and I for the Solstice Parade. I am going to locate a Wi-Fi place tommorow so I can use my computer to upload pics.

The Verde River monster

Seen today about 20 minutes from my house making his exit from the verde river. They(elk) don't usually come down this far into the valley. It means the game tanks are dry up in the rim country. Gonna be a dry summer.

A blog gem

5 daily remembrances

1. I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old.
2. I am of the nature to have ill-health. There is no way to escape having ill-health.
3. I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death.
4. All that is dear to me, and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them.
5. My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions.

-Thich Nhat Hanh, buddhist monk, teacher, activist

Clarkdale

Day 2 of the yard sale

Wannna buy a yard?

Yard sale

I'm going to be busy the next few days getting ready for a yard sale. Most of what I'm selling is at the other house and has to be shlepped over by me. Then it all needs to be cleaned up and priced. Kick off time is 7am Friday morning. Then its over at 1pm on
Saturday as I have to take notes for the dog park committee. Its been 100 degrees around lately. Really zaps me.

I didn't know I was going to be this busy in retirement. I volunteer to do different things. Service commitments...Lots of conditions placed on my being of service. Sometimes that can be draining too. Enough said. I'm just glad I have these two unconditional guys at my place that love me no matter what.

bird at the bar

The Day The Music Died

So the end has come for the Sopranos. The day the music stopped. All week the BF and I discussed every possible ending with every possible person we know who is a Sopranos devotee. And who would have thought.
Sometimes you win and sometimes you loose. Sometimes your the windshield and sometimes your the bug. My endings in my mind were much more dramatic, exciting,less exciting, less dramatic ad infinidum. Does life imitate art? Or does art imitate life. Art imitating ART? Anticlimactic, nothing much changes. The music just stops. Does a tree make noise when it falls if no one is there to bear witness? I remember what Nancy Marchand said to AJ just before she died. "In the end we die alone and none of it matters." or something like that. Symbolism with no meaning....Was it profound or just a red herring. Maybe the answer will come in John from Cincinnati which began before the silence had died. HMMM. Leave it to HBO.

another blog

Yesterday I made a wise ass comment about the profession and business I made a very good living at for 25 years. Some days I just will spare nothing to reach for the laugh. Yesterday it was arrowed at my clients. I have to say when I left Oregon 6 years ago the thing I missed the most were those wonderful women I sent many of my waking hours with being compensated monetarily and socially by. Granted it took some years to build a clientele that was such a pleasure to me and yes, there were those ones that I would weed out of my life because they were to much of an emotional draw for me.

The woman I worked with for years and eventually bought the business from died of colon cancer. Very traumatic and sad. I watched her year after year put up with very draining, picky, people. They came there because she gave and gave. And when she was diagnosed with the big C I often wondered how much impact her unwillingness to let go of people that were unpleaseable had on her cancer diagnosis.

I feel I was very lucky early in that career to have good business mentors. People that told me you can't please them all and there is somebody right for everybody but YOU don't have to be right for everybody. Someone told me if I felt like I wasn't being paid enough for my time and expertise to raise my prices. If I wasn't feeling compensated for my services it would reflect in my work. And another very wise woman told me if I thought I was charging to much then after bills and taxes if I still felt that way, She could find many a charitable organization to help me with my dilemma.

Now if I could just transfer that into my personal life. The woman that can't say no. I think it's a malady of the soul. If I do enough for others I will be rewarded. That must stem from the Christian ethic I had force fed to my by generations of guilt and shame. Nothing wrong with Christianity but sometimes, it breaks down in translation as do, dare I say, all religions; some religions; most religions. Actually that's a moot point. For me, it has broke down in the translation. I don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater....

I really am grateful I lucked onto 12 step programs to sort this all out. A starting place. Point zero for me. And all the doors that have been opened as a result of. My ability to utilize many a wise thought and not be shackled to the dogma. Well, geez, did I get off on a tear today. I do believe I am about done now with another blog.

I have a tree full of these lovely apricots

Does anyone have any good recipies? Or know how to make jam? Or want to come over and pick some?

One of my many jobs I had in my life was cordinating a gleaning project through a low income grant. My gleaners were usually guys from the county jail doing restitution for drunk driving offenses. I would pick them up at the jail and haul them around from place to place to pick fruits and vegetables the growers didn't have time to deal with. Usually it was plums that if they didn't get picked they would make a big mess on the ground that the property owners didn't like cleaning up. Usually underwatered trees that produced poor quality fruit.

Once in a while we would get a great peach tree or apricot tree. Then it was fun. Hard work but fun. We would take the good fruit and vegetables to people who were low income, mostly senors. It was great when we could bring them something really tasty. Really a great job making people happy. And my fruit pickers were always happy just to get out of jail for awhile.

But poverty programs don't pay very well and I moved on to trying to make spoiled rich women happy with the way they looked. but thats another blog

Leftover stuff in my yard

A little piece of my heart

To see my work clik on My Craft. It will take you to Planet 18. I'm slow and each piece is worked out until it is done. That,for me, is always a mystery, when it's done. Eventually, I will figure out how to use my paypal account from the E-Bay Sessions to fund raise my adventure before the gruelling days of interferon begin. I am going to return to my Gypsy past but with a cyber twist. Hopefully I can incorporate found objects into my pieces as Pete and I vagabond our way around. I need a good adventure and the desire to interact with days and friends of other times is strong. But I need financing. I'm willing to give a piece of myself thru my art objects in exchange for a financial donation.

Peace

My Craft

catching grasshoppers

Pete finding a little ray of hope

It's my lucky day. My liver Dr. said I will be able to do interferon again. the first time I did it was two years ago, I had to work the whole time because I was single and had to pay cobra prices for the ordeal. I felt lucky I even could do it. I was clear of the virus after 3 months of treatment and was feeling pretty good. But my white cell count kept plummeting. They put me on a drug called neupogen that made me feel BAD. I had to take pain meds when I went to work or I never would have made it. Usually I only had to take the neupogen a couple of times a month and then only one or two shots consecutively.

But at 10 and 1/2 months I was instructed to do three shots. I got sooooo sick. Couldn't keep anything down or in. Had to crawl to the bathroom, ect... this lasted a week. And the Doctor took me off everything. And I still had no virus. After about a month I started to feel good. Really good. And at six months better then I felt in years. And I did an other test for the virus detection. IT WAS BACK. And now for the last two years it has been eating away at my liver. That Dr said I was no longer a candidate for treatment.

So I played the waiting game.. when would I need a transplant. What would be the signs. Should I enroll or something. I no longer had insurance as the company I worked for cut insurance benefits for all their massage therapists, nail tecs, hairdressers, and estheticians. I couldn't even buy insurance. I would have to marry into it:+{.

Then I met a woman who had been thru the ordeal. She told me about a Dr. in Phoenix that had a good reputation but was had to get in to see. She was a wonderful mentor in the next phase on my journey. She gave me hope. And has always been there when I'm down. Just a phone call away as she now resides in another state.

I wasn't sure I wanted to even have a transplant. I new a few people who had been down that path. Some had died. All gave the virus to their new liver and one had to have another transplant 5 years later and was working on getting a third. I questioned the integrity of that. I questioned karma. I questioned Gods will. And I questioned my new Dr. about ridding myself of the virus.

The best I thought I could do was keep this liver I was born with as long as I could and hopefully there would be a cure for hep-c by the time my liver number came up. The thing I really wanted was to do interferon at a low dose to keep the hep-c from degrading my liver any more. This is relatively new thinking in the medical world and the State Insurance I receive is not very receptive to it. But my wonderful Dr. said he can make it happen. Hooray Hooray.

But.... I'm gonna get really sick when all this starts. It will probably be at the end of July or into August before approval will happen. After that I have to be monitored weekly. Stay close to the home front. Sooo I need to figure out a way to do a road trip in the mean time. I'm working on ideas. And that dear friends is another post. I'm tired and my fingers are getting forgetful.